Sometimes we have bad days

On a recent visit to our local grocery store we were met with a very unpleasant incident. Leah and I were waiting on dad to finishing paying at the checkout so it was the perfect time to take a stroll down to the flower department to admire all the pretty blooms

Not to far from us stood a family busy picking out some flowers, I noticed them doing the “I’m trying not to stare look” and nudging each other while mumbling under their breath, it s what happened next that unleashed the devil in me.

The mother took out her cell phone and walked up to Leah who has by this stage wondered away from me. She then proceeded to say to her husband “I have to take a picture of this, I have never seen them at this age before”. I then stepped up to her before she could take the picture and in no polite manner told her that I would make sure I broke both her hands if she perused the matter, most of what I said was not pretty at all……

She then looked confused, as if she could not understand why I found her comments rude? She actually said “What’s your problem… I just want to show my friend what midget kids look like”

The look on Leah’s face broke my heart, she went silent not understanding what had just happened she just knew it was bad. I didn’t want to make a fuss about it in fact I didn’t mention the incident  to my husband who was oblivious to what had happened… I wanted to play it down for Leah’s sake. Later that evening she asked me “If i prayed really hard do you think God would change me to look like Nicole and Simone?”. Fighting my tears I reassured her that she was absolutely perfect  just the way she is, I then went on to say we should actually be praying for all the people who are out there stealing oxygen just like that lady in the grocery store, we had a good giggle and as she fell asleep in my arms, I took pleasure in realising that I am so blessed to have her in my life, she was able to brush it off with a giggle while I’m sitting here days later thinking that I should have broken that women’s face!!!

Its true we will have these bad days and encountering this woman has made me understand why some animals eat their young…


41 thoughts on “Sometimes we have bad days

  1. I have tears in my eyes, my heart aches for you. And for Leah, who is old and clever enough to know or at least feel something is wrong. Everything, just everything about this is so terrible wrong. And I so understand your motherly anger. How will we ever be able to protect our loved ones from incidents like these? From cell phones and cameras, from stares? Please Lord, we will never be able to do so. We bring them to you, we leave them at your feet. HOW is it possible that there can be people like that??? HOW??? Ek is kwaad – én hartseer.

    • Hi Kristel, thanks for much for your comments on our blog, what makes us feel better is knowing we have great friends like you 🙂

  2. I’m disappointed in you! You should have smashed her fxxxxxx face in. Or the very least, made her accidentally drop her phone and you accidentally stand on it. OR, WHIP YOUR OWN PHONE OUT AND PRETEND TO TAKE THEIR PHOTOS!

  3. I was at a friends house the other day ,with my 10 month old son who has Achondroplasia, when a friend of hers arrived, she came in the house picked up my son and said “Oh look its the midgy midge baby, everyone needs a midget baby.” I was so shocked at the time i couldnt even manage to correct her =(

  4. It’s terrible the way people are these days ! I have dwarfism too I’m 23 years old and have a little boy he doesn’t have dwarfism, I get people staring and trying to take pictures of us all the time it’s such a horrible felling they just don’t understand we have feelings just like them too ! We may be small but we are no different inside ! Chin up to use both xxx

  5. This is exactly what I’m scared about for my “minipouce” Léane. People can be so rude. Oh god! I think I would have broken her face just as you wanted to… Even if this can’t help…

  6. Some people think they have a right to be just plain rude, i cannot believe the way some people behave, don’t they think that people with this have any feelings?? i remember my son at 2yrs saw a small person, he laughed, i caught him up on this as soon as it happened to explain that this person was still a person with a warm heart, and never to judge someone on their stature or the way they look. I really feel for this young girl,

  7. This is absolutely terrible. I cannot even put into words how horrific these “adults” acted. It’s as if appearing different qualifies others to over step the line and have uncalled for opinions/interactions. I have a special needs son, we often get looks or mumbling with the occasional stupid comment, and as a mother I feel a rising anger stir (similar to a volcano but not as lava-like). I just tell my children, some people need a hug with a mallet. (with love of course) But much love to you and beautiful Leah, lots of hugs to you both- from our family to yours.

  8. What appalling behaviour from this woman, with no shame either!! Her attitude belongs in the Victorian era! Is there a Little People group in your country, like in the UK and USA and others? Is there a local news programme or radio station you can approach to ask them run an item about people with types of dwarfism, and the need to educate the public in general? Hope you soon can find some support in your area. x x

  9. That is just insanity! How dare she?! I would have smacked that woman one nevermind you even though it had nothing to do with me! How completely inhumane and narrow minded and just plain bloody ignorant of her! Wow…..

  10. I was born in the 80s and I have dwarfism. In those days I remember my friends defending me against stares saying ‘taking a picture it lasts longer’… now they do… *sigh* These rude people are ugly people, they just show us [people with dwarfism and disabilities] their ugly side more quickly… ‘Normal’ people don’t have the benefit of seeing this ugly side so quickly, so could be wasting years hanging out with these unattractive people… Embrace the filter that is being different, you more quickly find the truer friends because of it. You might feel ‘othered’ more often and rejected more often but here is the positive, the people who accept our differences are so often the better people in this world. Who want’s to be accepted by narrow minded people with no taste? PS I whip my phone out now and film people back, ‘I need to get your picture to show people what ignorance looks like in someone your age’… lol… pointing a camera back at them, seems to stop it. 🙂

  11. As a 24 year old this sickens me. I don’t understand why people think this is okay! I understand being interested. As in asking a few questions. I am sure you are fine with it, because it would spread awareness. This…that lady had children she is pretty much showing her kids that bullying is okay. This is a form of bullying she made it as if Leah was not human. She maybe little, but her heart is big that is all that matters. I hope she learns that not everyone is a good person, but that doesn’t mean she has to take what those people say to heart.

  12. What is WRONG with people!! It honestly boggles the mind. Leah is beautiful and with a switched on mum like you, she will grow up focusing on what matters, not what ignorant fools think… But far out – I really want to slap that woman!!! You were well restrained 🙂

  13. Leah is absolutely beautiful. Its amazing how rude and ignorant this woman was and totally oblivious to the ludicrousy of what she was doing. Never mind impinging on Leah’s privacy also. I can only apologise to Leah and tell her that most of us adults have respect for others and teach our children to respect others also.

  14. My daughter and her three children are all achons. We had a group of oriental tourist pointing and laughing while we visited Neuschwanstein castle in Germany. One lady came running over with her camera to take their picture and I quickly stepped in front of her so she lost the shot and gave her one of the meanest looks I could give. It is heart breaking for ignorant people to do such stupid things. I wish I had a solution to this problem, but I have lived with this problem for 44 years. I’m glad Leah and you were able to giggle be ok. My daughter, Robin, now understands how I felt all those years when people would point, follow us around in stores and say inappropriate things. Her daughter is 12 and her twin boys are 10. They are beginning to notice people reacting badly. The wonderful thing is we are able to love them and try and keep their emotional tanks full of good things. We always tell them that God sent them as a special present and that he can’t trust everyone with very special people. God bless you all!

  15. This is truly heartbreaking. I have no words. I hope that it gets better and people can learn how their words can affect someone else so deeply. Being rude like that woman was truly shows her selfishness.

  16. Leah is absolutely gorgeous!
    I have a disabled 5 years old and people stare at her all the time, I usually say really loudly “let’s stare at this lady for just a minute to contemplate how ugly she is” – that usually gets them out of the way quickly.
    If I saw someone doing what this woman did to your child, even to my healthy child, I would have done exactly the same as you did!
    Well done!
    Dwarfism, differences or even disabilities make people different that’s all but prejudice is poison and it comes from ignorance!

    Keep being happy and giggling Leah!

  17. You are a great person. I would have hurt someone. I have 2 disabled kids and the comments I hear are just so rude and heartless. Continue to raise your beautiful daughter the way you are. Hopefully one day people will see everyone for what they are on the inside (the same). Good luck.

  18. Thanks for sharing the story. I really like one of the comments above that said, “embrace the filter of being different.” It takes time, but in the end, it helps. This morning, on my way to the train, I walked past a high school. Who knows what some of the students thought, said, or did. In my mind, the point, I was able to walk by the high school at a time of day when all the kids were filing in to school. There was a time, I would have gone the long way around. I could do it because I have been trying to embrace the filter.

  19. Oh dear, how dare she! Plain rude and ignorant. I feel your pain.I am 25 years old girl with dwarfism from Pakistan. Although i have met staring people, photo taking people and pity looks giving people but never such an a**h*le. If i were you i would have punched her face hard and said ” oh i just wanted to show my daughter how it is sometimes o.k to punch idiots in face.”

  20. As a mother of a 2.5yr old Achondroplasia daughter I feel the need to respond!!!!
    I would have got out my phone and taken a photo of her and said, “I’m just taking a photo of you to show my friends what ugly is!”
    As yet, I haven’t had to endure this sort of stupidity but I feel for you I really do. I cannot stand people saying “look how tiny she is” and this sort of thing is just the beginning!
    I will think of a decent come back when it happens cos so far I have realised that there are stupid, dumb, uneducated people out there!!!
    Chin up and hold your head high, they are the losers!!!! xxxx

  21. Honey we all deal with stupid people. But never be ashamed and tell your beautiful little girl that she is perfect just the way God made her. We all have things that people like to look at, comment on and i not unlike you struggled with dealing without looking my cool. But please tell yourself and teach her what a blessing the lord sent the day she was placed on this earth. Stay strong momma bear

  22. Your daughter is so beatiful just the she is. I know you are really proud of her. Good luck my friends.

    With love from tuscany (italy)

  23. Being disabled myself, I can understand how you and your child may have felt. I get tired of the rude and ignorant people. Also, my daughter was born with club feet and had casts put on her feet and legs in an effort to help correct the problem. We had stupid people making comments that we had broke her legs and how we should be turned into CPS. Your daughter looks like a beautiful child no matter what her problems in life may be.

  24. Way to go mom! Just last night we were in our local Walmart and the cashier looked at my son (almost 2 years old) and said with a laugh, ” He looks like he is going to be a midget when he grows up. ” Thank God for my cool as a cucumber husband who politely replied, “As a matter of fact he us indeed a *Little Person* he has a form of dwarfism called achondroplasia.” The cashier didn’t have much more to say.

  25. Leah is very beautiful. And you one awesome mom but that lady at the store had no right saying that to such a sweet baby u had all right to say what u did to defend you baby she is proud of u she is on special girl

  26. I am crying reading this. I am so sorry that something like this happened. But go you for standing up for your daughter and then being the bigger person and helping your daughter see they are the ones that need help. You are a wonderful mum.

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