Angry…………Of course im angry !!!!!!

Im so angry I could SCREAM!!!! , ACTUALLY IM SO ANGRY I COULD PUNCH A FACE……………….. I know I know calm down …………. BREATHE…..

Why is it that people cross the line then say “ I was only trying to help” then you end up feeling bad because you feel like you have been a royal B*##$@ because as they said they were “only trying to help!!!” Well not this time Im so sick and tired of hearing “Im only trying to help” help me by butting out …………. and if you don’t know what your talking about and you are not familiar with the facts then just SHUT UP and keep your wise cracks to yourself.

Well here in South Africa our Oprah show is a little (some times a lot) behind schedule so what our friends in the states have seen months ago, we get to see a couple of months later, and as you may have guessed when I said Oprah today’s show was about the Roloff Family!!!!!! I was quite excited because I finally got to see the much talked about show, and so did the rest of my family and friends, I got so many calls from people I haven even met reminding me to watch the show, …………………..Okay!!

After the show………. Is were my anger comes from; I once again get all these people saying…

“You have nothing to worry about, Leah is just small!!!”

“Charmaine why do you make such a big deal of things she is just small”

“There’s nothing wrong with Leah she will be fine”

“Char did you see the small people they are so cute”

What the hell would you know? How do you know if Leah will be fine? NO SHE IS NOT JUST SMALL!!!! Hydrocephalus, Kyphosis, SLEEP APNEA, BREATHING MONITORS , SMALL AIR WAYS, CHRONIC EAR INFECTIONS, Leah cant wear a pair of shoes and has lived in slippers for the past 21 months  because of her instep !!! Two CT SCANS A YEAR, regular checks for her HEAD GROWTH.

No, she is not just small, this is the reality of what we deal with, and I can hear you saying that Im being NEGATIVE, ………………..NEGATIVE………. ME!!!!!!!!!…………..NO WAY, REALISTIC is the word I would use, and well educated about all of the above, 21months of education to be precise, So if I loose a few friends about this then so be it , because I don’t need friends who I haven’t seen for 21 months to call up after the Oprah show and think that they know what Achondroplasia is about and that im making my child’s condition to worse that it seems.

The show was informative, and I know that Leah’s real challenges in life are still to come….. Will we be okay, IM POSITIVE we will be just fine , because we have been fine all along…………and that without your help, so if you don’t mind Get your facts in order, and DON’T tell me how to raise my child.

6 thoughts on “Angry…………Of course im angry !!!!!!

  1. Okay sweetie!! Breathe! Yes, Leah is “just small” but like you know, there are other concerns to be had with Achondroplasia that the public are not aware of. That is where you come in. It is all about education! People and friends do not know what it is like to worry about simple colds. Colds in our lives end babies in hospitals. The least of our concerns is the short stature. Okay is okay to be angry, punching someone in face I don’t recommend…:) You are living this life, not them. You are Leah’s protector. I know, I understand. Hugs to you my friend and continue to educate your side of the world because one day, it will all be worth it!!

  2. It’s Ok Charmaine. I understand where you are coming from. They probably don’t know what to say. To be honest, I usually say Preston is just smaller. I have been lucky in that he has not had any complications besides the crap with the ears and the respiratory stuff in the winter. You are allowed though to vent and I am glad that you did! Hugs!

  3. Some parents are suited to raise childern of diffeence….some are not!

    Signed,
    A parent of 3 childern with dwarfism.

  4. HiCharmaine

    I am mum to 2 year old fern with achon and totally understand where you are coming from. People are constantly telling me she will be just fine because of her happy and determined independant personality. they only think that size is the issue. I dont think size is the issue at all but society and lack of their education and thought. like you the comments I get are the same and do nothing to make me feel less worried re the future but still i think positive and will do all i can to help her grow up and have a healthy and happy life. Its ok to be angry.
    take care
    sharon

  5. Hey guys, im so happy that you understand were im coming from, people are so ignorant but whats more disappointing id that they are so close to learning more………. its because people think they no everything that the world is filled with ignorance but I wont lie down, as long as im on this earth I will make it my business to educate people about our kids.

    Charmaine

  6. hi.i couldnt help but want to respond to this.firstly we all know there are other issues with achondroplasia than just height, but even if it were only about height as some people may believe, this is still of a concern & people shouldn’t be saying there is nothing to worry about.who wants their child to have any difficulty in their life regardless, life is hard enough without having anything that may cause them harm, pain or suffering in anyway. i read a symposium written by an adult for a hospital to educate people about achondroplasia & she said the only time she feels normal in her life is when she is at the short stature conference one week in every year.i cried when discussing this with her mother and her mother didn’t even recall her daughter saying this. do we sometimes walk around not recognising things that we should recognise, thinking things are ok, when they may not be? may our children never suffer in anyway, but to say it is only a height issue so it is ok..is not ok in my view.our children need support and love and so do the families.for the friends of people with children with this condition or any other for that matter, how about asking if the mums & families are ok, rather than telling them that they are or will be? this is even more caring than just telling them things will be ok and presuming that height does not matter. people may have seen the oprah show (although i didn’t see it myself but i assume they were positive about the condition) & seen the adults appearing to be fine, but are they? do we know how they have suffered? what else are they to do but try and be positive about their condition? we love our children and we will support them through every challenge they have to face, but let’s not “play it down” so to speak and presume everything will be ok or even in charmaine’s case a friend saying “charmaine why do you make such a big deal of it”. let’s offer support in every area of every condition and more so for the innocent victims of a conditon that they have to live with. how could we ever presume to know that they will be ok. it’s not about negativity (i agree with you charmaine), but it is about facing the reality of what they may have to face and we too, as loving parents. support and care about us and our children is what it should be about…not playing it down like it does not matter. it does matter and this does not change our love for them in anyway. thanks

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